09 April 2009

UGH.

Two things. First off I meant to tell you this last night but I forgot. Two nights ago I had a dream where I was looking at the display buttons on my oven and noticed for the first time that one of them said "End Of The World" and another said "End Of The World LIVE!" So it turns out that once the end of the world came about, I could watch it happen, live even, on my oven display screen, which is approximately 1.5" across. I don't know about you, but when the world comes to an end the last place I want to be is staring at my stovetop. Because that probably means I'm cooking, which happens to be one of my least favorite necessary activites ever. But then, Heidi helpfully pointed out that I could instead watch the end of the world on the 5" screen on the side of my fridge (that magically appeared just then), which naturally would afford a much better view of the Four Horsemen. I agreed that that was a far better option. Of all of my appliances, the fridge is by far my favorite as it holds all of my precious, precious goodies. If I have to die during an apocalypse, I can think of no other overly large object I'd rather spend my last moments here on earth with. I love you, Sweet Refrigerator! I will send you a Hallmark card to make this clear.

And the second thing. *Sigh* I HATE asking for help. HATE IT. Because I don't ever feel I need it and then your friends help you anyway because they feel guilty/scared of hell if they don't. But apparently I do actually need help according to my OB (the good one, not the one I hate; or at least "good one" so far). I am not known for having healthy pregnancies in the least. They turn into high-risk pregnancies for various reasons, some imagined by doctors, some genuine. The most serious genuine problem I have had with both pregnancies is pre-eclempsia. It can be very, very serious if it's not controlled properly, as in seizures, organ failure, and death of mother and/or infant. Not pleasant. Given my poor history with this (bed rest for two months with PW and doctors constantly debating about how early to force PN out versus our collective health) I knew I would wind up with it with this one, too. However, I kinda figured I could dodge it for a while, especially given the fact that they didn't suspect me of having it with Peanut until I was three weeks from my due date. Well, apparently that wasn't meant to be. I am already leaking protein and my blood pressures are slowly going up and I'm only 18 weeks along. The OB thought it best to properly warn me that given how early this could be starting I could be looking at hospitalization if it's not controlled well enough with medication and resting as much as I can. She recommended I stay off my feet while I can now to hopefully stave off rising BPs, but I think I made a case that with an 18-month-old Holy Terrorist Mamma's Boy in the house, that's not too bloody likely. She asked if I could put the kids in daycare every day, but I can't do that with Peanut because of his allergies. I can stick PW in, but she's the one who keeps Peanut out of my hair most days, or at least more than when she's not around. She asked if I had relatives who could come and help out, but my in-laws are so old that they're exhausted if they simply stare at my children for an hour (and avoid doing even that as much as possible), and my mother drives my BP up more than any other situation on earth. The Husband absolutely has to work, but he is shifting his schedule to drive in at O-dark-thirty so he can be home in time to help feed PW and put the kids to bed so I can rest then. She asked if I had friends who could come watch my kids, but every person I know has trillions of small kids themselves and I really don't want THEM developing high blood pressure as a result of my kids.

So here is my pathetic plea: are there any friends close by who are currently Peawhistleless who would be willing to watch a Peawhistle play with their similarly-aged child while Peanut takes a nap in the afternoon, maybe just one day a week or something? She's good at playing on her own and she's usually good at not starting fights and stuff. Sometimes she's polite and she won't pee on your carpet. She has preschool for one more month that goes in the afternoons until 1:30 and that's when I've been able to put Peanut down for a nap. I just need some quiet time to lie down and more importantly calm down, because if there's one thing I'm not exactly known for, it's being calm, particularly around small children, especially my own. They stress me out like none else, particularly when elevated hormones are at play and I just want to cry and/or run away. So would anyone please help me with Peawhistle once in a while? Not every day or you'll wind up hating her, and worse yet, hating me. And we certainly don't want that because we all know you can barely stand the sight of me as it is. I feel really bad asking because now I feel like a complete failure both in the parenting department and especially the pregnancy department. But I really do need help. If this gets worse I won't be able to watch my kids at all, or worse yet, not even see them because I'll be in the hospital and we all know what that means: my mother will be here for months. I love her and I especially love knowing that she would do whatever she had to do for me and my kids. But she really, really stresses me the crap out. And the poor Husband said, "I really, really, really, really don't want to have to have your mom come out here for months. Really. Really. Really." Really. Anyone? Please? Help....

13 comments:

Bonny said...

With that lead-up, I was expecting you to ask someone to adopt your children and keep them full time for months.

OF COURSE I'd be happy to take PW for a few hours once a week. That's barely even a favor. Put me down as a weekly regular on your calendar. Mondays I don't plan anything on purpose so we can have a down day, so Monday would be great. Tuesday or Thursday would also be fine--Monday would be best, but just let me know if you need a different day covered. I know from experience that PW is a lovely child who plays nicely with mine. Let me know when you'd like to start, and how you'd like the logistics to work (did you want to bring her over here, exactly what time, etc). I would have happily agreed even without the sweet mug shot of your cutie pie.

And for the record, no one thinks you're a failure, at parenting or pregnancy. Silly Abby.

Kristin said...

Sign me up!! I LOVE watching other peoples kids. Just ask, I'm not kidding. I just checked my calendar and I can do every Wednesday for months and months. We'll have to talk more so we make official arrangements.

elesa said...

I would be happy to help, but I don't have any idea if I live close to you or not.

And just this morning I was writing a post about a dream I recently had. And now that I think about it, the world was ending for me too, but I got to spend my last moments with a deep freeze. Which just isn't as good as a fridge. Too bad.

Ryann said...

I would be happy to watch her. All you need to do is get her a passport, wait the requisite five months and then buy a plane ticket and send her here. I'll be all ready by then!

Seriously, sorry I can't be of any help. But if it is any consolation-she is still incredibly beautiful! I'm sure you will have plenty of takers!

Abby said...

Are you saying you WOULD adopt my children for several months? 'Cause that would be helpful also.

Thank you so much for your offers of assistance Bonny and Kristen, and thanks for the call, Jody. I really appreciate your help in this. You have no idea how happy and relieved you've made me with your offers.

Thanks Elesa, but we live on different sides of the country (I'm in MD). And if you're willing to pay to ship her out there, Ryann, by all means.

Jacob and Mindy T. said...

Sorry, I think I live a LITTLE too far to help out with your little Peawhistle. I would if I lived closer. GOOD LUCK! I wish I could get a good nap and calm down too.

Heidi said...

I would adopt your children if it would be any help, you know. Even with my already trillions of children. (Seriously, what's two more when you have four already???)

Silly Abby, I know you're at least as decent a mother as the rest of us. (You need to watch that Oprah show where all the moms confess their "deep dark secrets." Although my mom and I agreed while watching it that these moms weren't telling their REAL deep dark parenting secrets. Just the semi-dark ones.)

Glad to know I could be of help in directing you to your frige in your dreams. I wonder what on earth I was doing in MD though.

Stephanie B said...

Abby - I'm soooo sorry! I wish that I wasn't clear across the country now. We'll keep you guys in our prayers!

Melissa said...

Olivia doesn't have school on Fridays - send her over every Friday! You'd actually be doing ME a favor! Olivia...The Child Who NEVER Stops Talking...needs someone else to talk to besides me! When school ends, send PW over every day! Seriously...you'd be doing me a favor. When does PN nap? I'm a slave to E's naps...so we're always home!

greta said...

so abby,
you are my God send! since i myself have been hospitalized for months on end with EVERY child, i too have thrust my children in other peoples care. i never thought i could make it up...until now! hooray. i can watch your kids whenever. angela has school in the morning so i can come over in the morning to watch PN, or PW could come in the afternoons to play with angela. just let me know. i'll be waiting for your call....

Abby said...

You were in Maryland spending valuable time with me, Heidi. Duh. Thanks for the offer, though.

Thank you all SO SO much for your offers of help, even the ones who are too far away to follow up on their threats of service. Melissa, I've sent you an email asking if you know what you're in for. The rest of you fine people I should be seeing in church tomorrow. God bless you all and your naive, charitable views of my sweet child.

Jenny Smith said...

Let me have her one afternoon a week. Though I must warn you, JJ has developed a severe attachment to Tom and Jerry so she may have to spend hours watching it.

it's just lisa said...

I would be happy to help out too. Once a week would be so easy- and I can pick up and drop off.