10 September 2008

Be Funny or Else!

OK, here's the deal. As many of you now know, a young couple, Christian and Stephanie Nielson, barely survived a serious airplane crash and now have extensive burns over a good portion of their bodies. A recovery fund has been set up to help pay for medical expenses and the care of their children while they remain in the hospital for a number of months. An explosion of concern has swept the blogging community, including at one blog I stalk, Navel Gazing at Its Finest. As a fund raising gesture, Navel Gazing, et al, is creating a blog book with proceeds to be donated to the recovery fund for the Nielsons. Entry into the blog book is a contest of sorts, the details to be found here. Basically, they're looking for funny stuff. And by stuff, they mean blog entries, previously posted or not, less than 1500 words. The deadline for submissions is September 30th; all entries can be emailed to sometimeslifeisfunny at gmail dot com. If your post is selected you make it into the book and you then have to buy said book. Also, if the post you submit is new material (unposted) and it happens to be the funniest thing she's read by this Friday, you get $50 from Navel Gazing. So by all means, write away.

Here's my dilemma. First problem: the submissions have to be funny. If they're not deemed funny enough they'll be rejected. Second problem: it's pretty hard to be funny on demand and with a deadline. While I don't need the $50, I would love to submit something new, but I can't think of a frickin' thing to write about. That leaves something I've already published, except I have no idea what's funny in my blog and what isn't. The things that have cracked me up have gone largely unnoticed and things I found only mildly amusing or a complete failure were met with a several compliments. Clearly, I'm only funny on accident (which is about par for the course).

So to all three of my beloved readers I submit this plea to you: if you had to choose a favorite post (i.e. one you found the least offensive to your sensibilities) what would it be? Failing finding anything remotely funny in my archives, what would you have me write about? And while you're at it, submit something of your own. You could get published in a book! W00t!

Note: photos are discouraged, which means posts that rely heavily upon photos (like the Dora cake post) would probably be rejected simply based upon that alone.

2nd Note: I can rewrite any post to make it fit the requirements and any post that is not standalone I can make standalone--mostly this works because all of my posts are under the word count limit so I have room to make necessary story adjustments. Given that, have any suggestions? Any funny stories you and I have that I've never written about?

18 comments:

Unknown said...

Should I write about the horrible date at the beginning of the year, or Mr. Kissie Face?

And I like the stuff where you banter back and forth with someone. Got any IMs you could post?

We could expand on the tapping comments.

And you are always funny to me.

Janie said...

it has to be the one about you driving with the van door open

Abby said...

Misty--well, the posts have to be relatively clean, so that pretty much excludes Mr. Kissie Face (because really his reputation is what is so funny about that story and his reputation is in no way family-friendly). Your crazy momentary broke boyfriend (wait...weren't they all like that?) would make a great story if you can really punch it up with funny crap. I can't remember what was funny about him seeing as I can only remember the horror. If you can make it funny, do it.

And thank you, I think you're funny too. I promise I will call one of these days when I'm up late.

I don't recall specific posts where I've bantered back and forth with anyone and I haven't IMed anyone in years. A little help?

The tapping comments--I think all I could say there. I stopped because I couldn't think of anything else to say, especially that would remain firmly within the family-friendly realm. Keep that part in mind.

You really liked that one, Janie? I enjoyed it too, but I wonder if I've over-advertised it. Any others?

TheOneTrueSue said...

Abby, thanks so much for talking about this, and I really do hope you'll submit something. I'm excited to see what you end up sending. :>

Anonymous said...

i liked your vampire story.

Abby said...

You are sweet, Whitney. That was one of those things that I'm fairly certain only you and I found amusing. C'est la vie. Thanks for your support anyway (you and I share too much of a sense of humor, obviously). :)

Jody said...

My all-time favorite is the Dora cake! Maybe they'll make an exception about the pictures because it is so hilarious. I also couldn't stop laughing when I read "Surprise! You have no friends!" and the vampire one. I do think you're hilarious and you're good with whatever you submit.

Heidi said...

I'm partial to the Devotion in Vain post (April, I think?). I know there are others that succeeded in making Terence laugh loudly, but he's not here so I can't get his opinion yet. I'll try to get back to you.

Bonny said...

I agree with Jody. "Surprise! You have no friends!" was the first one that came to my mind.

Ryann said...

I'll have to reread your blog to find my favorites of your posts but I do think most of the time your stinking hilarious!

The proof to that is that even Sue reads your blog now! I bet if you take any subject, you'll do just fine!

Abby said...

I don't think Sue reads my blog. I'm fairly certain she was simply checking up on me to make certain that I was abiding by the rules of the contest before I could submit anything to her. But thanks for the assumption anyway.

Are you sure you didn't like the Lisa post because I was making fun of someone you know?

I liked the Colbert portrait story, too, but it is too long. I'll have to cut it down.

Alas, there are NO exceptions to the no-photo rule--photos will cost too much to print in color. So no Dora cake. Boohoo.

Gwennifer said...

Basically, any in which I am in some way involved.

And the Twilight Party. That one's a winner in my book.

Kleanteeth said...

I like the van door one too. If you can make up stuff, you can use your Dr. evil guy and throw in an appointment where he grabbed your butt to check your pulse.

Abby said...

HA! If only people would actually believe that one.

Bonny said...

True, maybe it's only hilarious to me because I know L. Bowman. I doubt it though. Your description of how your parents acted on your special day was pretty dang funny.

Jacob and Mindy T. said...

driving with the van door totally gets my vote...at least at this point. Let me re-read through your blog and I'll get back to you. I always think you are HILARIOUS!!

Stephanie B said...

I can't wait to hear if you win.

Abby said...

If I don't I will absolutely cry myself to sleep. REJECTED.