26 June 2008

I Fill So Blessed....

The EDS Blog has a new humor blog linked. It's BRILLIANT. It's called "Seriously, So Blessed!" The characters are the author "Tiffany/Amber/Megan/Nicole" and her husband "Jordan/Jason/Wes/Taylor" (aka JJWT). As a satirical blog, the author embodies every negative stereotype of the typical young naive and empty-headed Molly Mormon who Blogs About Her Perfect, Awesome, Blessed Life. My favorite post so far is "Hooray for Date Night!!" Here we begin midway through her account of trying to find a parking spot at California Pizza Kitchen for her date night with her Perfect Husband, JJWT:

"So, after we were blessed to find a parking spot, we had a cozy dinner at CPK (LOVE it...so dang good!) and split a yummy BBQ chicken pizza (totally crave it), big salad and MONSTER raspberry lemonade. We really like to split things so that we can sit on the same side of the booth and feed each other from each other's plates and everyone can covet me and see how JJWT has broughten sexy back. I literally LOVE my life!!

"Then we walked over to the fountain where we found the brick that Jordan/Jason/Wes/Taylor bought for me before he left on his mission. (Anyone want to guess what it says?? I'm not telling . . .) That brick brings back literally a bazillion memories--LITERALLY--of the two years he was away! Whenever I started to miss him too much I would go sit by it, gaze into the dancing waters of the fountain and find the inspiration to write him, even when it was impossible to live because I felt like half myself had literally been amputated. So hard! But we made it through – even though I got engaged twice during the time he was away – I just KNEW that Jordan/Jason/Wes/Taylor was the one I was meant to be with! And now we are more in love and have more fun than anyone else, so thank you for making each and every minute of each and every day the best possible minute and/or day for me!"



Ah, the funny. The author is looking for things to blog about so by all means, email away. Oh, and be on the lookout for the written Utah accent. Huzzah!

5 comments:

Trina said...

The liberal use of the word "literally" is insane, but somehow, I suspect, eerily accurate. I read it and laughed, but also thought that it's really and truly pathetic that there are people that ditzy out there in the world. Here's hopin' she never leaves Provo, because life in "the mission field" ain't such a bed of roses!

Also, the frequency of her soul-calming pedicures is probably the reason there are so many bankruptcies declared in the state of Utah - little princesses expecting their COLLEGE STUDENT husbands to provide the same level of living that Daddy did.

But ya know, I'm just jealous that TAMN is "seriously, so blessed" in Zion while I am living out here on the East Coast in a small apartment with no cable surrounded in my neighborhood by heathens and I have to do my own pedicures. So what am I saying?!?!?!

Ryann said...

I love that you write about the sites that you like. i also am a fan of naval gazing-keep passing the winners on!

Holly said...

How did you come upon this one?? Very entertaining!
The sad part is it sounds EXACTLY like a blog I stalk of a girl I worked with last year...

judiroso said...

I know people who have written blogs almost identical to that one! Sad, yes but also very true!

Abby said...

"Sad, but true" seems to be the overarching theme in responses to this blog. Sad, but true indeed.